My Dad has Dementia

My blogs are usually light. This is not dark but just totally honest and highlighting something very important in my life, my dad. The dementia has changed him somewhat but underneath it all, there is still the very sweet kind man who was always there.

During the transition he went through some tough times. He didn’t understand what was happening and he was scared and he took it out on those around him. He ran into the neighbors mailbox and blamed it on the car. He started making lists to take to the store because he would forget why he was there. (But really don’t we all need to make lists?)

I spent a few days with him this past week, unfortunately it was a few days in the hospital. He taught me something about him. He doesn’t immediately know the answer to any question. It is something you need to draw out of him. I feel like we get so impatient and want immediate answers. If you remind him and kinda prod him, he gets it.

I think patience might be the answer to everything though. Let’s not be so quick to judge. Let’s try to wait and see what happens because you never know what is going to happen and if you are open to it you get to experience miracles and LOVE! IMG_5720

21 thoughts on “My Dad has Dementia”

  1. I am so sorry to hear that for your dad and for you and your family. It can be a long and very tough journey. I have take care of quite a few people with dementia and you are on target. To be patient and kind with him are the greatest gifts you can give. Oh and love of course! I will keep you close in my heart and prayers. ❤️

  2. Sending my most positive thoughts out to you and your father. The circle of life can be a challenging journey ❤

  3. Thinking of you and your family. Watching aging parents is a very difficult thing , but one we all have to face. We lost Dad in 2007 to cancer, and Mom has dementia and major heart issues. Never easy!

  4. My thoughts are with you and yours during this trying time.
    I’m sending positive thoughts your way and always know, he still loves you, it’s still there. Big hugs.

  5. Just Jan:

    This is the blessing. This is what you know you know about your Dad. This will help to make…Peace Be Still.

    You Wrote:

    The dementia has changed him somewhat but underneath it all, there is still the very sweet kind man who was always there.

    I spend mega hours with lovely souls whose minds are afflicted with dementia. I know what you know…they are still in there. And so, you love ’em just the way they are.

  6. My mother had dementia. She was also blind, which made it harder for her to recognize people. Before I realized she had it, we got into many fights over nothing. It’s good that you know early on he has it so you can adjust your behavior accordingly. They need us to have a lot of patience with them. I wish you and your father the best.

  7. Me, too. I had to make the decision recently to place my dad in a memory care facility. My mother, his love since they were 15, is lost without him. I live everyday with anxiety and frustration because I am helpless. I have to take emotion out of the decision making process. Dementia always wins. And the game it plays is horrific.

  8. Jan, you have found some great suggestions. Being patient, waiting for his responses and expecting miracles are excellent and loving ways to cope.
    I hope people around your Dad will continue to readjust the way they approach him. Showing respect for him and giving him choices which are manageable are a few more suggestions. . .
    My Mom is best in the morning. She is like the old label of a “sundowner,” where she gets forgetful more as the day goes by.
    It is not diagnosed for her as Alzheimer’s or Dementia. She still only takes nutritional supplements and a baby aspirin every day. I like how one of my 7 grandies approaches her. He reminds her of things and when she forgets he gives her credit for “being busy.” He’s 9 year’s old and handles her wonderfully. ❤️ The memory care unit she lives in has a really nice activities leader, who puts my grandson “to work.” He helps folding cloth napkins and setting the table. He sees my Mom smile at him and thank him, too. 🙂

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